Albert Pujols is the most interesting thing in St. Louis baseball, part 700

Stay thirsty, my friends

Last night in Dodger Stadium, where he resurrected his career after being designated for assignment by the Angels, Albert Pujols hit the 699th home run of his career, a two-run shot off Dodgers’ starter Andrew Heaney in the third inning. And then followed it an inning later with his 700th.

After four and a half below average seasons with the Angels, Pujols found himself a free agent, falling short of closing out the ten-year deal he signed following the 2011 season to leave St. Louis. There was a little flirtation with a reunion with the Cardinals at the time, but ultimately, he would sign with the Dodgers who had a larger role available. In 85 games with the Dodgers, he would hit 12 home runs with a 100 wRC+ and proved himself to still be one of the league’s best offensive threats against left-handed pitchers.

That rebound with the Dodgers and the implementation of the DH in the National League, set up a situation where the Cardinals needed a guy who could hit left-handed pitching and who better to bring in than—with all due respect to Stan Musial—one of the best, if not the best, hitters in franchise history for a final year to bring a close to one of the most legendary careers in baseball history.

As I put it in March, John Mozeliak has gotten the band back together. Pujols, Yadier Molina, and Adam Wainwright. Both Pujols and Molina have said that this is their final season. Wainwright is waiting to decide.

Even with the addition of Pujols, a run at 700 didn’t seem likely. He was going to be caught in the middle of a lot of young, exciting players. He was really only impactful against left-handed pitchers. And he wasn’t going to play the field a lot behind Paul Goldschmidt. I figured if Pujols was playing enough to hit 21 home runs this season, I’d be asking how far out of the playoffs the Cardinals were because something must have gone wrong. But here we are.

With 89 wins through 152 games, the Cardinals just need three more wins to have their winningest season since winning 100 games in 2015. They need four more wins to secure the NL Central regardless of what the Brewers do for the just the second time since 2015 as well.

Barring a slump in the last ten games of the season, Pujols’ 12 best seasons in Major League Baseball are going to come in a Cardinals’ uniform. That seemed almost impossible when he left after 11 seasons. His previous worst season in a Cardinals’ uniform was a 147 wRC+ in the 2011 season. His best season in another uniform was a 133 wRC+ in the 2012 season, his first with the Angels. So far this season he has a 143 wRC+.

With that home run last night, a three-run shot off Dodgers’ right-handed reliever Phil Bickford in the fourth inning, Pujols became the fourth member of the 700 HR club, joining Barry Bonds, Hank Aaron, and Babe Ruth. He and Aaron are the only two to also have 3,000 hits. He and Ruth are the only two to have pitched in the Majors. And he and Bonds are the only two living members.

There’s a lot of different ways to cut it to make it feel more impressive, but only four guys in almost 150 years have done it. It might be the most exclusive stat “club” in baseball. And he might be the last one to do it for quite some time.

Second-place among active players is Miguel Cabrera, who is 194 home runs behind with 506 and 39 years old. He does plan to play next season and has talked like it will be his final year. If next season is his final season, he would need to nearly triple the single-season home run record of 73 to get to 700. Not gonna lie, that would be fun to watch.

Pujols’ former teammate Mike Trout is the youngest player in the top-10 for active career home run leaders at 31 years old with 346 home runs. If Trout retires at the end of his current contract at 38 years old, he will need to average 45 home runs a season for the next 8 years. He’s done that just once.

Bryce Harper is the youngest player in the top-20 at 29 years old with 284 home runs. If he retires at the end of his current contract at 39 years old, he needs to average 46 home runs a season for the next 9 years. That’s four more than his single-season career high of 42.

The next player younger than Harper is Kyle Schwarber at 30th. And he’s 140 days younger than Harper and 91 home runs behind. Meaning if he played another 10 more years, he’d need to average 51 home runs a season. Math is not on their side.

You might say a player like Juan Soto, who is still just 23 years old, has a chance. And it’s true that he might, but he illustrates why it’s so hard to project off a guy so early in his career. If Soto were to play to 40 years old, he just needs to average 34 home runs a year to get to 700. That seems attainable except when you consider that 1) 34 home runs is his career high at this point, 2) 17 years is a really long time to stay healthy in baseball, and 3) he’s playing the next couple years in the pitching paradise that is San Diego.

I’d be willing to bet that the next 700 home run player—if there is a next 700 home run player—has not yet made their MLB debut.

For the first time last night, after watching the replay of his 700th home run for what felt like probably the 700th time, I allowed myself to think about the playoffs and that it really is the end of the line for guys like Pujols and Molina and maybe Wainwright. As someone who really started following the Cardinals closely in the early-2000s, this is the end of a chapter for me. It got me thinking about how falling short of winning the World Series will burn extra because of that.

I want to party like it’s 2011.